Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
Phew! Thank you, warning label. I was actually considering using my toaster in the shower this morning.
I was going to have alligator for dinner but realized I only had a croc pot.
My fear of moving stairs is escalating.
One of the darkest times in my life was when I forgot to pay my electric bill.
Did I ever tell you about the time I went mushroom foraging? It's a story with a morel at the end.
I had a quiet game of tennis today. There was no racket.
I'm such a good navigator, a self-driving car once asked me for directions.
I got a new pen that can write under water. It can write other words too.
My job is secure. No one else wants it.
My out-of-office reply should just be permanent.