Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

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Adults are just kids who owe money.
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Every USB plug requires exactly three attempts to insert. It's a universal law.
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Grocery store self-checkout is just an unpaid internship.
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You don't realize how antisocial you are until someone knocks on your door unexpectedly.
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The older I get, the earlier 'late' becomes. 9 PM might as well be 2 AM.
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My brain has too many tabs open.
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I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge.
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I was addicted to soap... I'm clean now.
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I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
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If you are still looking for someone who will change your life, look in the mirror.
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